Who's Made it Big?!

Ahh! See who's made it big over in France!




The Queen and Joyyodda's Album, "Just the 2 of Us" has made it so big that star celebrity Paris Hilton was invited to promote their music. This is indeed a breakthrough for the two who have come a long way from a small town all the way in tiny Singapore. Hard work and perseverance has finally paid off for the duo as they finally broke out of the limits of Singapore's music industry and decided to try their luck in France.

Congratulations to them and rumour has it that Paris is going to donate the album to a correction facility where they punish criminals through hard-to-stomach music.




credits: photofunia

How to help?

How to help someone you know for a long time (but have been distanced after a period) when he/she has been struggling with a particular problem for almost a year?

You don't think you can do anything to help relieve their pain. Even if you try, you won't know whether or not it's helping. So how do we "help" then? So that's the frustrating bit. Then again, because you have not been in contact for a while now, you think you can just leave him/her to their own device. Tsk, but that's not what friends are for right.

SO HOW. How do we HELP.

H-E-L-P.

I'm sure everyone has been in this position once before. How did you guys manage to get through that and help?

Terrifying Sight

So far, the transition from my house in Woodlands to Yishun has been alright. It won't be exactly the same of course, but the occasional bugs/beetles/lizards can be dealt with. (OK not so much the lizards, as long as they don't make their home in my room I'm fine with that.)

Recently though, I've been catching glimpses of these little critters around in my room.

Terrible lizards. Can't stand those beady eyes, webbed feet and their disposable tails. It's frigging disgusting. There is this gap between the wall and my closet right in front of my desk, and during the day, I catch glimpses of "things" moving around inside. They're too fast for me to catch a second look but I know these irritants are probably building a darn nest behind that closet. I can't imagine how I'm going to do my spring cleaning during chinese new year. I think I'm going to buy a few canister of insecticide and just start spamming it all through that crack. (Neighbours probably think that I'm fogging my room, with all that gas going out through the window.) EH, not insecticide, I think I need cyanide.

However, that's not the worst bit. On my way to the toilet just now, I happened to look down at the cup I just drank from a few minutes ago. Lo and behold! There, in that very cup I just drank from, sat the unholy of all unholies, most disgusting of all disgustingness, irritants of all irritants, pukes of all puke...

A lizard.

URGH. Those beady eyes! Hate it! Raised goosebumps on my flesh for a bit. I don't think I'm going to eat ANYTHING on that table anymore. You know how disgusted I felt?! I'm not even sure if it was in there BEFORE I drank from that cup.

What happened to the uber clean house I used to live in!?

Mundane

I'm starting to feel the dreariness of life already. Maybe it's just because I'm in NS. I know I know, everyone will just tell me to suck it up. Everyone has to go through it.

I know we do! But I wish I could have been doing more meaningful things! My vocation as store supervisor, while I do try to provide to the best of my abilities, I believe not much people can appreciate what we do. We're probably very much labelled as "expendables" in their eyes. Especially the older people in army. The "enciks." And that's the thing I can't stand about it.

Do this do that! This week, I was asked to do a mountain of work for this dude who's not even in my wing. He called me out of the blue to meet him in the office and BOOM, he throws a pile of shit right on my head.

How nice.

And he DOES have his own store supervisor. Hmm, why me then?

Meaningful things, what I meant by it is that I wish I could do something that will allow me to achieve something useful at the end of the day. I don't get anything out of this! Actually sometimes I wish I wasn't a medically unfit person in the army. At least I would stay fit should I be posted as someone undergoing physical training.

How about even a medic! Why not. That's something meaningful. Even a driver! At least they get a license outside once they're done with army. Gosh. Ok I don't want to sound like I'm complaining, but I really just wish people would appreciate what I do more. And really, a little encouragement can go a very long way.




They should know that.

Cute Boy Pawnzxzx All

'Nuff said, this boy > All of us.

Bedtime Stories

I was going through all my files and folders from my past years in secondary school when I came across the story of "Rapunzel" that I modified with the help of my friend's sister.

"RAPunzel"

There was once a couple who had wished for a child, but alas, they were granted none. They lived in a shabby little house, behind which a splendid garden could be seen. It was filled with the most beautiful flowers and herbs. However, it was surrounded by a high wall. the garden belonged to an enchantress, who was powerful and feared by many.

One day the wife was looking out the window into the garden and a bed of fresh green Rapunzel and had a sudden desire for it. This desire increased as days go by and she began to grow pale and weary. Her worried husband asked her what was wrong. She told of her craving for the herb and told him she would die if she cannot have it.

Her husband decided to take the rish and go steal some Rapunzel for his dying wife. At twligiht, he clambered dwon over the wall into the garden of the enchantress, hastily clutched a handful and was about to leave when he saw the enchantress standing before him.

"How can you dare," said she with an angry look, "descend into my garden and steal my herbs? You shall suffer for it."

The husband explained that he had to do it out of necessity if not his wife will die. Then the enchantress allowed her anger to soften, and said to him, "If the case be as you say it is, I will allow you to take away with you as much Rapunzel as you want, only on one condition. You must give me the child which your wife will bring to this world."

The man in his terror consented to everything, and when the woman was brought to bed, the enchantress appeared at once, gave the child the name of Rapunzel, and took it away with her.

Rapunzel grew into the most beautiful child under the sun. As demure as she was, she was highly energetic and loves singing. When she was twelve years old, the enchantress shut her into a tower, only accessible via a secret stairway which only Rapunzel's voice can reveal. When the enchantress wanted to go in, she placed herself beneath it and cried,

"Rapunzel, Rapunzel! Sing for the stairs!"

Rapunzel parted her lips and a melodious song magically moved the rock slab which then revealed a long flight of steps up the tower.

After a year or two, it came to pass that the king's son rode through the forest and passed by the tower. Then he heard a song, which was so charming that he stood still and listened. This was Rapunzel, who in her solitude passed her time in letting her sweet voice resound. The king's son wanted to climb up to her, and looked for the door of the tower, but none was to bfound. He rode home, but the singing had so deeply touched his hear, that every day he went out to the forest and listened to it. Once when he was thus standing behind a tree, he saw that an enchantress came there, and he heard how she cried,

"Rapunzel, Rapunzel! Sing for the stairs!"

Then Rapunzel began signing, much more melodiously than the king's son had ever heard. He saw the secret stairway open and decided to try his luck the next day. The following morning, he went to the tower and cried,

"Rapunzel, Rapunzel! Sing for the stairs!"

She began singing and revealed the stairway. The king's son then climbed up. At first Rapunzel was terribly frightened when a man, such as her eyes had never yet beheld, came to her. But the king's son began to talk to her quite like a friend, and told her that his heart had been so stirred that it had let him have no rest, and he had b een forced to see her. Then Rapunzel lost her fear, and when he asked if she would take him for her husband, and she saw that he was young and handsome, she thought, he will love me more than the enchantress does. And she said yes, and laid her hand in his.

Rapunzel confronted the enchantress and told her she wanted to go away with the king's son. Of course, the enchantress knew about it since she has much power and was admiring the king's son's looks. the enchantress used this opportunity to be angered by Rapunzel's sudden decision to leave and for allowing the king's son to go up the tower. she used her magic to trap Rapunzel's melodious voice inside herself and instead gave Rapunzel now a rough, low and monotonous voice. the enchantress than chased her away, far from the tower.

On the same day that she cast our Rapunzel, however, the enchantress sat by the window on top of the tower, and when the king's son came and cried,

"Rapunzel, Rapunzel! Sing for the stairs!"

As the enchantress sang, the king's son ascended the hidden stairs and instead of finding his dearest Rapunzel, he found the enchantress, who gazed at him with wicked and venomous looks.

However, the enchantress usd magic to bewitch the poor king's son to believe that she was Rapunzel. Blinded by witchcraft and magic, the king's son embraced the enchantress and kissed her. On that very evening, they exchanged vows. the enchantress was joyfully delighted to have finally found a companion for life, while Rapunzel had to suffer in the woods, alone, unable to sing to anyone. However, with her new voice, she decided to improvise and soon, in her boredom, wrote lyrics and rapped in the woods, hoping that someday, someone would hear her and appreciate her voice.

Where is everybody?

It's been a long time since I posted something huh.

Really isn't anything else to post actually.

I feel kinda empty these past few weeks. It feels like there's nothing to look forward to. Or nothing big or great. It's only those small things that keeps me sustained, but even that's not enough. Not very sure what I'm rambling on about but I think I kind of lonely.

Sure, there are colleagues/friends in camp, but somehow for me, it's different from making friends in school or outside. I feel that at the very most, majority of our conversation only revolves around work-related topics. And that's makes it a... Superficial relationship? Which is quite depressing, and what with the "dog-eat-dog" working world out there, you'll never know who's going to stab you in the back or start shovelling their shit at you. It's only going to start making things worse. ESPECIALLY so with my family in France.

:/ I miss them. (Urgh, sounds so cheesy coming from me.)

But it is the truth!

So everyone has gone their way, some poly, some working... Hard to imagine that all of us used to be in the very same class for years and had such fun together. Now, I don't even know what they're doing or where they are any more.

Such a gloom and doom atmosphere I have created! I think I need to borrow more self-help books.

I really need to get a life! Find something out there which I can occupy myself with. A long term project or something! The question is... What? Think think! It must be feasible!

Anyway, Christmas and Chinese New Year is coming! That's something to look forward to I suppose. Things'll start getting merrier that's for sure.

Bah, stuff this.




Where is everybody?

Proof That Women Are Born This Way

Hey, sorry for being so inactive. Nothing much is going on in my life. It's NS, what do you expect?

But here's a short video clip to entertain you while you wait for my posts to come.

Evidence to show that women are born this way:

Urgh, can't really stand my appointment in the army. Yes I am blur, and can't pay attention to every thing that is required of me, but you don't have to deliberately have everyone telling me that I'm not doing very well in a roundabout manner! Everyday I face the prospect of having to hear small negative comments (they do it in a sarcastic way yet not showing that they are being unfriendly) of me not living up to the expectations of my job. Gosh even the toughest rock will be worn out by the constant rain won't it? God, I'm so drained constantly trying to smile and laugh it off.



I miss my non-army friends! (No no! Don't get the wrong idea, I don't categorise my friends.) And my family too! Heelim hurry back!



So far Tiawan has been pretty enjoyable. sitting in the humvee cruising the streets of Taiwan to send ration has been very eye-opening. It looks very similar to JB and KL though. I've been hearing stories of stalls in Tainan that sells this sort of weird looking and tasting food called "Bing Lang" (correct me if I'm wrong.) Apparently these stores are very famous and popular because of their unorthodox, yet effective methods of enticing customers to buy their goods.



I'm not very sure if it's true, (if it IS true, I DEFINITELY want to have a look. Err no hidden agenda about that.) but I'm told that there will be super-hot-nose-bleeding babes will sell this weird tasting good and after every purchase you are allowed to grab their boobs and mould it like you mould dough...



Ok not really, but yea you are allowed to grope em for a while! Hell yea let's (rhyme bosoms with something) Who's to say that these business will fail despite it's ill tasting product. Though I have not personally tried this edible THING, the reaction from my colleagues is a good enough deterrent.



(Ok let's pause here for a bit... Let the guys fantasize about those grope-able bosoms.)



Crazy daisies! Taiwanese sure are one horny bunch of people. I've been seeing and hearing so much stories related to sex that I'm beginning to think that prostitution isn't such a taboo as everyone makes it out to be anymore. Just outside my camp has a few whore houses already. And yes! I've seen a few of them hawking their wares after last light with their fat mama-sans. (These are the main attractions when we're on our way sending rations.) Oh and how about a price quote for those soulja boys?



1200 NT - 20 mins of heaven, which equates to about S$60.

AND if you know people around here:
1000NT for 2 hrs, that's about 50 bucks.

Don't ask me how I know all these prices so well. I'm just the guy who happened to be there listening at the right time and right place. Really.

That's all.

Well I'm off to feed the hungry souls out there doing sentry again. It's time to oggle at the prostitutes and breathe in the wonderful smell of XIANG JI PA!!

"Tell him I have a tiger down in my pants!" says my indian friend to me to translate to our taiwanese driver.

Ingnorance.

Hey hey hey!

I've been reading this book, "The Book of General Knowledge" by John Lloyd and John Mitchinson and I tell you is uber interesting. It's a must read! I urge you to pick yourself off that executive roller chair you're in (cause I know you're definitely not fit to be one) and roll yourself to the library to get your hands on one.

Here's a few articles which I found pretty interesting. Not sure if YOU might find it interesting but... Hey you think I care??


How many penises does a European earwig have?

a. Fourteen
b. None at all
c. Two (one for special occasions)
d. Mind your own business

The answer is c. The European or black earwig carries a spare one in case the first one snapps off, which happens quite frequently. Both penises are very brittle and relatively long; (LOL. Aww that's just so sad. Looks great, but it's not living up to it's look.) at just under a half inch in length, they are often longer than the earwig itself. (Now imagine a human being made like that! Bet they have to modify our clothing just to house such a monstrous thing.)

Two gentlemen at Tokyo Metropolitan University discovered this when one of them playfully pinched a male earwig's rear end during the act of sexual intercourse. (Who? The gentlemen or...? Kinky.) Its penis snapped off inside the female, but miraculously it produced a backup. (That's very useful.)

------------------------------------------------------------
What Edison invention do English speakers use every day?

The word hello.

Edison suggested that the best way of starting a conversation by telephone was to say "hello" because it "can be heard ten to twenty feet away." He used to shout "hello!" into telephone receivers at Menlo Park Labs while he was working on improvements to Alexander Graham Bell's prototype telephone. His habit spread to the rest of his co-workers and then to telephone exchanges until it became common usage. Before "hello" was used, telephone operators used to say, "Are you there?" or "Who are you?" or "Are you ready to talk?" (LOL! Let's try greeting each other with a "are you ready to talk" next time eh?)

------------------------------------------------------------
How many senses does a human being have?

At least 9.

Besides the 5 senses we have:

1. Thermoception, the sense of heat (or its absence on our skin.)
2. Equilibrioception - our sense of balance-which is determined by the fluid-containing cavities in the inner ear.
3. Nociception, the perception of pain from the skin, joints, and body organs. Oddly, this does not include the brain, which has no pain receptors at all. Headaches, regardless of the way it seems, don't come from inside the brain.
4. Proprioception, or "body awareness." This is the unconscious knowledge of where our body parts are without being able to see or feel them. For example, close your eyes and waggle your foot in the air. You still know where it is in relation to the rest.

Some argue that there are more than nine and up to twenty-one. What about hunger? Or thirst? The sense of depth, or the sense of meaning, or language? Or the endlessly intriguing subject of synaesthesia, where sense collide and combine so that music can be perceived in colour? And waht about the sense of electricity, or even impending danger, when your hair stands on end?

---------------------------------------------------------
Where was baseball invented?

England.

Baseball (originally base ball) was invented in England and first named and described in 1744 in A little Pretty Pocket Book.

--------------------------------------------------------
What was Mozart's middle name?

Wolfgang.
His full name was Johann Chrysostomus Wolfgangus Theophilus Mozart. He usually called himself Wolfgang Amade (not Amadeus) or Wolfgang Gottlieb.

--------------------------------------------------------
What drives human sperm wild?

The smell of Lily Of the Valley.

It appears sperm have "noses" which they use to navigate toward a woman's egg. Researches experimented with a range of floral fragrances and lily of the valley came out on top, getting the random sperm wriggling in the same direction at twice the normal speed.

--------------------------------------------------------
What did Atlas carry on his shoulders?

Not the world but the heavens. Atlas was condemned to support the sky by Zeus after the Titans revolted against the Olympians. However, he is often shown holding up something that looks like the globe, most famously on the cover of a collection of maps by the Flemish geographer Mercator.

Toilet

Hello my meaty friends.

You know, recently I found that going to pee-pee in the toilet is getting harder for me. Whenever I pee I always have to pass some wind out as well. It's like some dual-toxin-outlet-port. I pass toxin out in front, as well as behind now. How convenient.

However, this noisy process can become quite a problem in public waste disposal chambers. Lol it happened quite often a few weeks back. I had the most immense urge to let the gas outta my system while I was urinating, but because there were other people around me I had to try to hold it back.

That's harder than it sounds.

Holding your fart back in your butt is an indescribable feeling, but describe it still I shall. Have you ever had an experience like that? Holding back a large amount of fart is near impossible really. When it comes, you have to let it go. Holding it back is a bad thing. Grandma/mum says it becomes "wind in your stomach" if you do that. Which is a bad thing. Don't ask me how, but if it's bad, it's bad right?

If you have been holding it back for a long time and you still try to hold it back, it really really will hurt. There was once I held my fart in for so long cause I couldn't find a deserted place to release my gas that it hurt and it actually brought me down to my knees when I got home. It's like some internal butt cramp. Cramps inside you. A bit further up your butt. It seriously hurts!

So the other day at the shopping mall's toilet which was averagely populated, I let my fart out in tiny bursts. At the same time, I worked my butt cheeks away from each other (which is quite difficult to do I realised) so as to minimise the amount of noise it'll make. (That squeak-squeak or the bloooorgh-bloooorgh.) OMGOSH, it's so embarrassing I tell you. My plan failed and I let out an audible squeak. I zipped outta there once I was done. Good luck to those still in the toilet. It was DA BOMB.

OH yea. Lol I have this habit I'm ashamed of but nevertheless, I will still share it with you all. What is it?

I
Like
To
Release
Trails
Of
Fart
When
I'm
Walking
Around
In
Malls.

There! Haha. And it's harder to get caught cause there's so many people and by the time someone realises it, you'll be looong gone. (Eat my dust! No wait, smell my gas suckers!) LOL. Ok of course I don't do that when I'm with friends. So embarrassing and the probability of you being the last one lagging behind is... I don't know. Just. Yea whatever. It's just bad. So.. Don't do it when you're with friends. Okay, shit, I'm not asking you to leave a methane trail when you go out....

But it's so funny!! (And fun in a way. Call me sick/crazy)

Poot-pooooot-poot!

Random Interesting Videos

Here are some random interesting videos I found on youtube. Enjoy!
And call me a MASTAAA OF INTERESTING-YOUTUBE-VIDEOS.



Work with me for this video! It might seem boring at the start, but hold on!


Here's another different one though: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLYD_-A_X5E&feature=fvw

Makes me wanna dance!

Windows orcherstra. Lol



German Prank! No more japanese ones!




Haha good ones eh?

Random

There was a group of cats meowing so sadly on my way back to my old house to collect something that it made Goosebumps appear on my flesh.

Then all of a sudden, this crazy cat hiding in the bushes suddenly just clawed my legs.

What gives?

Then I thought to myself, oh no, I think I'm cursed. That cat just cursed me. So I prayed a bit, hoping I can set up some spiritual force field around myself to deflect any incoming curses.

My paranoia started getting to me while I was walking through that spooky corridor back home. That corridor that always makes me turn my head around to make sure no one's following me. And if I try not to turn behind, I keep thinking and thinking that there's someone behind me! So as I was walking out of the lift through the spooky corridor, MJ's "You Are Not Alone" started playing.

!!

I'm not?!

Right after that song, Good Charlotte's "I Just Wanna Live" came on.

HOLY COW. Is this a sign?!

"You Are Not Alone" followed by "I Just Wanna Live"??

I think that stupid cat cursed me.

Random & Completely Useless Information

• For a short time in 1967 the American Typers's Association made a new punctuation mark called an interrobang, which was a combination of the question mark and an exclamation mark. It was rarely used and hasn't been since.

• Author Lewis Carroll combined the words chuckle and snort to come up with the word chortle in Through The Looking Glass.

• The letters of the word SHAZAM, which was shouted to conjure up comic-book hero Captain Marvel, stood for Solomon's Wisdom, Hercules's Strength, Atlas's Stamina, Zues's Power, Achilles's Courage, and Mercury's Speed.

• A trilemma is a dilemma with a third alternative.

• The english syllable Ough can be pronounced nine different ways. Sentence that contains them all is: "A rough-coated dough-faced thoughtful ploughman store through the streets of Scarborough and after falling into his slough he coughed and hiccoughed."

• Romans had three words to describe the kisses: the kiss for acquaintances, the baisium; the kiss between close friends, the osculum; and the kiss between lovers, the suavium.

The Seven Virtues

• Justice
• Fortitude
• Prudence
• Temperance
• Faith
• Hope
• Charity

The Seven Days of Creation
Created heaven and earth day and night.
Divided heaven from earth.
Created the land, the sea, and vegetation.
Created the Sun, the moon, and the stars.
Created creatures great and small.
Created mankind.
Sanctified the seventh day as the day of rest.

The Seven Ages of Man. (according to Shakespeare)
The Infant
The Schoolboy
The Lover
The Soldier
The Justice
The Pantaloon
The Second Childhood.

The Seven Spiritual Works of Mercy.
To convert the sinner.
To instruct the ignorant.
To counsel those in doubt.
To comfort those in sorrow.
To bear wrongs patiently.
To forgive injuries.
To pray for the living and the dead.

The Seven Corporal Works of Mercy.
To tend the sick.
To feed the hungry.
To give drink to the thirsty.
To clothe the naked.
To harbour the stranger.
To minister to prisoners.
To bury the dead.


I'm sure if we can at least try to follow The Seven Virtues and The Seven Spiritual Works of Mercy, our lives will definitely be more meaningful. For now let's all try to fulfil the 7 works!

New Record

Yay beat my old record of 96! Beat me and tell me.

110 words

Typing Test

Funny GIF

Who loves Lord of The Rings?!

We do we do!




We is happy! Moving picture makes us laugh! We is happy!

Inspiration

I've finally graduated from the the Supply Supervisor course in army!

Wew and what a relief that is. Can't have imagine that 8 weeks has passed that quickly. Though it was quite a pain to be slaughtered by the warrant officers in the course, I think I've taken quite a bit away from this place.

And if my bunk mate, Umar is right, then this course would be the best time of my army life.

I suppose he IS right because I've never had so much fun with so many people at one time before. There was this "satisfaction" I gainedfrom meeting and getting to know all these people from my course. It made me realise that I have actually a very small circle of friends (No, I'm not some socially shy guy.) and there's THAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT
many more people out there waiting for us to be friends with!

There are so many people out there to get to know that we really shouldn't be sitting on this very chair we're sitting on right now and worst of all, be in front of the computer using this stupid "substitute" method of social interaction. I mean come on! I know there are people (like you! Yes you!) who sit with their group of friends and their laptops, then when they knowingly know their buddies are right next to them, they still HAVE TO PM them when they can just turn their heads speak to them. But noooo, they are "lazy to talk lar" or "easier to type than talk mah."

We really should JUDO-CHOP these evil computers that has pervaded our lives and smash their screens in with our foreheads for good measure. We should be out there! Away from the house! Anywhere where there are people! I'm sure everyone's waiting for someone whom they can share all their stories with. There's just SO MUCH to know about people and SO MUCH to learn and SO MUCH to share.

So why are you still sitting there?




--------------------------------------------------------------------------------




Wew. That just had to come pouring out of my head. This perspective on life hit me all of a sudden during the middle of the day while I was having fun talking to someone in the course who I just got to know a few days back. (Gosh I feel so ashamed of myself! Seen him around for so many weeks and I never bothered to talk to him.) Haha well I feel good now that it's all out from me. Hope you don't find me too philosophical, cause that's what I think we all should be doing! Anways for all those critics out there who disagrees or hates what I'm saying or think it's LAME...




(Pause for dramatic effect)





F__K YOU.

"Whatever"

Here's a video of a cute little girl saying "whatever!" Complete with the hand motion and the eye rolling!

I'm Strong.

Would you look at that!

I was being a good grandson by mopping the house for my grandma until I happen to bend the ALLOY-STEEL-REINFORCED pole of the mop. No shit.

I. Am. STRONG.



I'm sure you can tell I'm a very hardworking cleaner. To be able to bend such a rod, (Shakes head) just amazing...

You must be impressed.

Wasn't feeling very good over the weekends, so decided to head over to a clinic to see the doc. In the end got MC till Tuesday and all of that cost me... 50 bucks!!

Oh my goodness! If I knew it was that expensive, I would've pushed for... I'm sure you know what... This week is a terrible week to be in camp. Tsk tsk. Never mind! I'm aiming to be a proud member of the Food and Service Group during our exercise! (FSG really is: Foward Support Group.) Atten B! Atten B!

Oh yea! The term for my mobile contract is nearing it's expiry which means recontract and a new phone! Woots and for this recontract, I'm eyeing the...

HTC SNAP!



Wowowowowowowowowowowowowowow.

Doesn't it scream to you Classy! Slim! Sexy! Super! Amazing! I-know-you-want-me!

Sadly, with my mobile plan, recontracting with this phone will cost a very big bomb. It's the same price as my iPod. Asking my dad to help sponsor will definitely not work since he already bought my iPod for me. Boo!! Paying for it myself is... I don't know. Should I? It'll totally bomb out my salary for the month. That's bad! Last month I didn't handle my money well. I think I expended it all.

But omgosh... Just fantasizing about it in my palms, stroking the sides, running my fingers over it's keypad and breathing onto it's screen...

Makes me want to climax...


Oh dear!!! Someone advise me! Go google about it's raving reviews. It really is a good phone for people who likes email and text a lot. Excellent qwerty keyboard.


Ahh.. ohhh... Uhhh yeaa you feel so smooth in my hands... Ohhh yeaaa.. UHh OHHH yea.
HTC SNAP.

Baby swearing? Really...

Wow, I thought babies were cute and innocent. This one actually swore.

If you turn your volume up a bit, you can hear him swearing.

National Day!

It's National Day!

HAPPY 44TH BIRTHDAY MR SINGAPORE!

Thank you for giving me endless tests and exams, thank you for putting me into a conscription army, thank you for letting me spend 2 years of my life doing something I find quite pointless, (sorry to say, but YES. That's what I think.) and thank you for the humid weather. And so I shall wish you a happy birthday.

Woots!

See even my nephew's so happy celebrating!



Nephew: "Uncle Nick ish sho fun to bwee wif!"
Nick: "You got that right boy."






Nick: "Grr, see how strong my biceps are boy. Feel the POWAAA. FEEL IT. Grr."
Nephew: (Struggling with breath) "Yesss uncle. Stwong you are"
(Note to Anson's family: Do NOT worry, I did not use much strength, and it doesn't look as painful as it is. Really. REALLY. Just ignore the look of... Erm. Discomfort.)

Muahahaha.

Ok I'm just really bored. Oh here's another random picture. It was ages ago. Bowling session with family:



Yep, that's how I begin my pace before I bowl. Gathering power from a very special and personal power source.

And to end this post about nothing, here's a video of my nephew (name's Anson. He's so handsome!) head-banging to the theme song of Thomas the Tank Engine:

Check out his expression @ 0:32 Funny!

Catching Up

Hmm, this is the first time in my 19 years of life that I celebrated my birthday without the presence of my family around. It doesn't really feel any different though. But that's because birthdays don't seem so...

Special any more?

Perhaps as a kid we were more susceptible to all the hype and excitement conjured up by our parents, "Ooo, it's going to be someone's special day soon!" and stuff like that. I always remember when I was younger, and my birthday was only just round the corner, it was all I could ever think about. I felt so... SPECIAL. Even going to school, I felt like I was the MAN ya know? DA MAN!

But... As compared to now, it just feels like any other days, except that my wallet has grown strangely heavier.

Hmm... Nice.

Well, my 19th birthday was still pretty unique though. When everyone was singing the birthday song, they called my parents and put them through the loudspeaker so they could sing for me too. (Aww how sweet!) AND, after that, we actually went on skype so they could be "present" for the cake cutting ceremony as well as the giving out of the ang baos! Woots. (Since they couldn't pass me any, I got money credited into my account! Muahahahaha.)

Oh and my sister gave me a nice "gift" as well:

( Space to be uploaded with a picture when I find it... Soon.)


Then here's a random shot of my sister enjoying life at the backyard of our house in France.




Ahh, jealous you guys must be no? I know I am.

OH YEA. On a random note, I think my grandma is trying pop the 3 Cs onto me so I would finally succumb to her relentless dissing of vegetarians and their vegetables.

The 3 Cs:

• To Convince
• To Confuse and to
  
• To Con.

Scary isn't it. An old lady trying brainwash her own grandson. Just this afternoon, while we were about to have our lunch, my grandma pointed to a dish that resembled those KFC's popcorn chicken and told me to have 'em. She insisted it was vegetarian and that's because my mum left a few items of vegetarian ingredients for her to cook for me. However this happened to be a leftover from another time when my mum fried those popcorn chicken. So my grandma "assumed" (or maybe she knew it was meat in the first place and just wanted to mess with my head) that it was vegetarian as well and then cunningly utilised the 3 Cs to put some meat in my mouth.

But of course, my keen sense of smell safeguarded my body from breaking out into rashes as I quickly consumed my food before she could dump any on my bowl.




Still... Had no idea my grandma had it in her to play mind games...





So that's how you want to play it eh Old lady?
(Cracks knuckles.)

Farking Hell

I really have to start doing something about this.

The Chinese lady tenant in this house is being an internet HOG:

HOPELESSLY - OBVIOUSLY- a - GUNDU.

I really want to get out of this chair, tear down her door, kick her in the guts and then start straddling her. CORRECTION: Start beating her brains, then line all her fingers up and start stomping them with my army boots on so she'll never be able to hit a single key on her keyboard. Say goodbye to your stupid chinese video streams or whatever crap you are doing in that room of yours. (WTF? Straddle her? My guinea pig's visually more appealing than her!)

I can't stand it!! I know that she's footing for half the bills and my dad the other half, but what gives her the rights to HOG all the bandwidth? Leaving me with a measly connection.

• Youtube takes forever to load.
• Some sites won't even LOAD.
• Even navigating to sites on the iTOUCH sucks because of her.
• AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, SHE HAS DESTROYED MY GAMING PARADISE.

O-M-F-G.

I'm getting 1000+ ping from this. I bet even people from Krungthep Maha Nakorn Amorn Ratanakosindra Mahindrayudhya, Mahadilokpop Noparatana Rajthani Burirom Udom Rajnivet Mahastan Amorn Pimarn Avatarn Satit Sakkatuttiya Vishnukarm Prasit, (Which is a place in Thailand) don't get this kind of shitty latency.

WHAT'S UP WITH THIS.

I wanna lodge a complaint to the Chinese Embassy.

(Clears throat loudly and coughs up a phlegm or two.)
"YOUR citizen has invaded my personal virtual space. I believe I am entitled to the right of my own personal space and freedom, however, ever since on the 12th of July 2009, YOUR citizen of name: Choo Ching Chong (yes this is made up, but I'd wish her name's like that) decided that it was CONVENIENT to start invading my virtual space and start inviting massive multiple streams originating from your country I believe. Yes she IS entitled to whatever she wishes to do on her computer since she is footing half the bill, but no one shares a piece of gum even if they paid for half of it! (Uhh, I hope that makes sense.)

I hope you will take what I've said into consideration and hopefully you will show up in my apartment with a Cease and Desist Warrant for her. That would be ideal. Thank you."




Ching chong choo please shoo!

Here I Am!

Salutations all my meat eating friends. I am sincerely not apologetic for not being able to post things so far. Actually if you think about it, I do not have any exciting progammes in my life. My life is as flat as Pamela Anderson with her silicon implants removed and her chest lipo-sucked away. How exciting can army get? Even the word ARMY really means something boring. ANOTHER-REALLY-MONOTONOUS-YEAR.

So for these two years don't expect me to post anything exciting unless you decide to hand me a million dollars and tell me you're a god sent medical officer who's liberal enough (by the standard of all the 'chao keng-ers') to dish out MCs whenever anyone deems themselves fit for it. (5 days. I only ask for 5 days! That's 5 out of the 7 days we have in a week. Perfectly reasonable.) So if you're not, go eat some sun screen or something...

Haw haw haw!

With my parents gone, there actually isn't any MORE freedom. Contrary to what everyone's been thinking. Army's the only restraint to TOTAL freedom that I could have. When I book out I really only have 2 whole days to myself. Come Sunday afternoon around 5pm, I've to start busying myself wit army related activities such as uploading the weekly reflection (which I've taken up to become a fully fledge Singaporean and use this outlet rightfully given to me to lodge complaints after complaints) and packing my items for the week.

I miss my family. The moments all unnoticed scraps, now suddenly priceless. As the saying goes, "You'll only treasure what you have until it is gone." True true. But adjusting to a lifestyle without my parents wasn't very difficult actually. Being away in camp helped me adjust in a way. That's the only good thing about it I suppose. Aww all the talk about my family and me being stuck in army has made me SAD. LOL. when Nick is sad, Nick wants to flatten and level things. so watch out all you busty girls out there. I'll be ready with my mallet and vacuum cleaner. (Vacuum cleaner = improvised liposuction machine thingum)


With a WHAM and a BAM, I'll level your mountainous chest!

Gone... At last?

My family are finally out of my life.

And I don't know what to make of it. Should I be jumping in joy? Pumping my fists, showing people my freedom pose? Or should I be drowning in my sorrow, that there will be no more laundy-free days from tomorrow...?

Mixed feelings.

Yep, but like always, it'll take some time before the real emotions start sinking in and then hitting me right in the face one day. Before you know it, my pillow will be wet with tears. Oh boo hoo hoo Nick Oh. Boo hoo hoo.

Tons of people turned up! With half of the group belonging to my sister and her friends with HALF of that group made up of guys. Wow. My siSTAR sure is popular. Oh, wish I could upload the video I went around taking at the airport. It was pretty drama rama. Few of my Aunts were shedding tears and trying to dodge the camera. Cousin Si Jia was the only one working her tear ducts hard there. Aww, Joy meant something special to you! Lol.

When it was time to go, my family went around hugging everyone else, and so did I. (Why did I have to hug people? Good question. Well it was a good chance to collect some free hugs. So why not huh?) Again Aunts started crying and stuff. Especially my mum and siSTAR. Oh I did give my mum a hug before she left though. I'll upload some pics when I get it all organised. I gave my dad a manly handshake and felt kind of sad that I didn't get the chance to hug my sister. Oh well...


Well they're off. They're off! What can I do. I'm sure I can hold my own without them around! I should anyways.

Alrights, I'm off to battle bugs, beetles, flies, lizards, roaches and even more beetles in my new home.


ONWARDS!

Emergency Emergency!!

1000:

Chalet's all over. Everyone's packing up all their things and preparing to go home. Mr Guinea Pig's in his cage and put into a big plastic big (which was a terrible mistake) with his accessories.

1058:

Arrived at Ang Mo Kio and parked at a nearby hawker centre to have lunch and we made sure to park under a shade. Too bad Mr Pig had to stay in the car. It would be nice to carry him around though.

1135:

Done with brunch, we drove Grandparents back to their home and started unloading everything up. Again Mr Pig had to stay on the shelf just right behind the back seat of the car, but we turned the air conditioning on for it so it wouldn't be too hot.

1215:

Finished unpacking everything for grandparents and began the journey home. Mr Pig's quiet, must be enjoying his air con. Arrived at around 1227 and unloaded all our baggage. Mr Pig gets to go up first! When I grabbed the big plastic bag he was in to get him out of the car, I realised something was wrong. There was actually moisture on the plastic bag


.

OMG


Quickly took him out of the plastic bag only to see him lying limp on his sides. Rushed upstairs to quickly get him into a cooler area. I believe he had a heat stroke! HEAT STROKE! Took us around 15mins before we realised we should have given him a cold bath so as to lower his temperature quicker. Then another 10 mins to send him to the vet when we weren't sure if the treatment was working or not.

OH - AM - GEE!!!

So hopefully we weren't too late. Parents just sent pig to the Vet. So now he's hospitalised at 20 bucks a night. LOL. That's... Funny. Heard that the vet even asked my parents if they wanted to visit him another time. Well, hopefully he'll pull through. Never spent that much for a pet before.


See Mr Guinea Pig! WE WUV YOU SO MUCH!
Muacks muackx (Okayyy... I don't usually do that, but heck, it's cute right? RIGHT?)
XOXOXOXOX

So!

• I flunked my A levels.
• Did nothing for several months.
• Nothing meaningful whatsoever.
• Only made my parents annoyed at my sloppy behaviour.

Where does THAT leave me? In the pits of hell where I'm sure some of us believes that I should be slowly broiled in a cesspool, then taken out and dried, afterwards marinated in cum (yes cum!), thrown into a room full of horny girls (ooo I like where this is going) and soon after, join the 2girls1boy1cup video and purposely leak it out to the public. Which in the end I will face public humiliation and shall not face the rest of humanity forever and will be only find solace amongst my homosexual buddies.

NO - I am not a bisexual.
NO - I would not like to make a 2girls1boy1cup video.
YES - I am a nobody and should start making plans to be a somebody.

Thus, my dad and I (well my dad pushed for it) have decided to sign me up for a diploma course so I would not WASTE any more of my life to the evils of being a nobody.

Diploma in Mass Communications.

Ha! Yes that is what I wish to do after much consideration, BECAUSE, in the not so distant future, (imagine me standing up straight, eyes to the horizon, ready to take on the world!) I wish to be a writer! Write for a noble cause. Write about violence, abuse, sex, drugs, money, sorry correct that: Dirty money. LOL. OK not really. I really really want to work for an entertainment magazine like PLAYWORKS! How noble!

Anyway, the unfortunate thing was, I had only 4 A level credit, if I had 6, I would be able to skip a few basics modules like economics and maths. (How horrible!!) Well doesn't matter, when my family's in France, I will do my best to make them proud. This 2 years will be the period where I will finally become a MAN.

A MAN. An independent one! I know it'll be difficult, with my family not around and all the temptations out there. But I WILL SURVIVE.

Oh no, not I!
I will survive
as long as I know how to love
I know I will stay alive
I've got all my life to live
I've got all my love to give
and I'll survive
I WILL SURVIVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

Yes people! As long as you know how to LLURRRVEEEE, you will, YOU WILL, (say it with me now!) YOU WILL SURVIVE.






Oh! Did I mention, they have have hot hot girls there.

What I Think

I've been trying to keep this inside of me for a long time. Tried to talk to a few people about it but still can't get it off my chest.

So we've got a pretty strong relationship going on, (well not so much now in my opinion) and we trust each other to keep one another updated in the going ons in our lives. That was pretty easy to do, until I realised there was a chink in our relationship after getting into tertiary education. So yes, you could say we were drifting apart. I was trying to salvage it but it had not much effect. Guess my friend managed to get more from fishing in the pool of friends than I did.

Anyway when something significant happened in my life, I did not immediately confide in this friend. It was not to say I was trying to keep it from him but rather I was finding the correct time to let him know. Somehow or rather, he was informed of what has happened through someone ELSE who was clearly the last person he would expect to hear it from. Thus, -cue the disappointment, the sadness, the annoyance.-

BUT F___ING HELL. THINK I GIVE A DAMN? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Okay, guess that was unexpected explosion of emotions coming from me. But I have something I want to rant about! When a particular "thing" I think I should have the right (cause we were close, we were like knitted together, that's why I believe I'm entitled to this RIGHT.) to know about every single thing about it, happened, I could not get a SINGLE SH*T out of this person!

Double U - TEEEE - EFFFF (it spells wtf if you still can't register it into your puny brain.)

So how can you say you were disappointed/annoyed/sad/depressed/suicidal/manic/ready-to-jump-into-a-pit-of-lava-with-a-gazillion-litres-of-poo-dumped-inside because you got it from someone else but me.





So yea, how can you...

Powerful Books

So! I know I haven't updated in a long time and have probably lost a few readers but I'm back with things to write! Actually I had a lot to write about, most of it army experience, but due to the fact that we are prohibited from publicising anything about the army, I had nothing to blog about for the past few weeks.

However, here I am today, actually sitting down in front of my computer to attempt injecting life into my blog! Mind you though, this post and the few upcoming ones aren't really exciting or have anything directly related to me.

Since I'm in a "terribly" welfare company in army I have tons of free time in camp to do NOTHING. Fortunately my section mate Ronald lent me this book, "Flowers of Algernon" which is reaaaaaaaaaaaaallllllllyyyyyyy good. I like how the author puts down his ideas and thoughts. I was really in awe! So here are a few quotes and passages from the book which I really liked. Enjoy!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Flowers for Algernon - Daniel Keyes

Passage of the day.

Why haven't I ever noticed how beautiful Alice Kinnian is? She has pigeon-soft brown hair down to the hollow of her neck. When she smiles, her full lips looks as if she's pouting.

We went to a movie and then to a dinner. I didn't see much of the first picture because I was too conscious of her sitting next to me. Twice her bare arm touched mine on the armrest, and both times the fear that she would become annoyed made me pull bacl. All I could think about was her soft skin just inches away. Then I saw, two rows ahead of us, a young man with his arm around his girl, and I wanted to put my arm around Miss Kinnian.

Terrifying. But if I did it slowly... First resting my arm on the back of her seat... moving up... inch by inch... to rest near her shoulders and the back of her neck... Casually.

I didn't dare.

The best I could do was rest my elbow on the back of her seat, but by the time I got there I had to shift my position to wipe the pespiration off my face and neck.

Once, her leg accidentaly brushed against mine.

It became such an ordeal-so painful- that I forced myself to take my mind off her.

This passage just... Got me. Somehow. Lol and this was how I felt when I just got to know Cass. So lovely!

Day With Friends.

So 2 days before I enter army, decided to take the day out and have dinner with two of my good mates Heelim and Amin! (They're also my fellow cs team mates.)

Had a free dinner (thank you very much MINister and JBBOY) at Pasta Mania. As usual, the same dish: Al Funghi. Vegetarian of course. It's been so long since I had it.

Felt relaxed and at ease like I've never been in a long time with them. Really enjoyed myself today. Har har har!

OH, and then midway through dinner, I glanced up, and I saw her with her friend. And for that several short second, so many things went through my mind. I knew she saw me too. She saw me, then looked away. It all happened so fast that Lim and Min didn't have the chance to see her. But I was sure it was her. If not she wouldn't have reacted the way she did when she saw me. But then again, I could be wrong. Well whatever.

Just that whenever I think of it, of what happened, and of what we had, I just get very mixed feelings about it. Talked to close friends and I get very different feedback. There's one side, and then there's the other. I remember the sleepless nights I had just thinking about it. How questions after questions kept coming up in my head.

And finally, it'll end up in a big round and a big question...





I want the time to think.
Maybe NS will give me that time.
I hope I'll come to a resolution.

NOT HAPPY.

Cousins are over.

I'm enlisting this Friday.

Why can't my mum just let me do what I want before I get out of her life for 2 weeks? I know I shouldn't be saying this and some of you would say I would regret saying this, but I wished they would hurry up and go to France now.

OK, so I finally gave in and said I'll turn the com off, but straight after, she just pull the plug on my computer. WTF. DIDN'T I ALREADY SAID I WAS TURNING IT OFF. I KNOW YOU'RE HELL BENT ON DESTROYING MY PRECIOUS BUT DO YOU HAVE TO DO IT WHEN I CONCEDED TO YOUR REQUEST?

That got me mad. Luckily I had my battery there. Sheesh.

This is just an angry rant. I think she's gonna come out of her room again, but let her be. Show her I still won.

I know I'm childish. But who isn't when they're so pissed.

Item up for bid.

Item #1209123 is up for bid.

Item #1209123: Nick's extra NS admission ticket.

Description:

It is the entrance ticket for the enlistee's family and friends who are going to witness the oath taking by the new recruits. As the tickets are very exclusive, I'm giving YOU, (yes you!) the chance to witness one of the most prestigious and important event of a guy's life. Where "boys to men" happens. Where "innocence to maturity" happens. Where "bag-O'-bones to Abs-O'-bricks" happens.

Yes.. Yes... Yes! This chance to see Nick live at the oath-taking won't happen twice fools. Tickets are going fast, and this could be the only one left! So, I'm sure you know what to do.

Starting bid: $1,301,123 (Could be the only one left in Singapore.)







Price excludes Sistica fees. Please call 61239731 for more information for this event. Hurry! Get your ticket now!

Listen.

What's up with the bunny suit?

Disguise.

Hello.

I was going through my computer's folders when I came across an old conversation I had with my classmate during school a year back. The funny thing about it was that I was pretending to be someone who I wasn't and he didn't know that it wasn't the person he was meant to talk to the whole time! LOL. I was bored as hell so I was going around copying people's msn nicks and talking to friends.

So anyways, my friend's Navin, (no offense Navin! But it's pretty funny. Lol.) and I was pretending to be his friend Thipan who is also my classmate. So yea. Read on. I was in character and shiiiit.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------


Thipan says:
Navin
Navin says:
dae
Navin says:
(#@!?)* fuckin selit dae
Navin says:
she comes and talks shit to me now..
Thipan says:
i know dae! i heard she keeps asking people to do the shit i was supposed to do
Thipan says:
so what, are you going to do it?
Navin says:
fuck no..
Thipan says:
shit, heard (as9131)* said she will pick people tomorrow cuz i din turn up?
Navin says:
im not goin to do it..
Thipan says:
eh dae, if she force you, and say no, shit's gonna happen man.
Navin says:
do you honestly think i care..
Navin says:
i rather fuck with esther then go to on stage
Navin says:
but there is a high chance that i'll get called..
Thipan says:
i ain't gonna do shit
Navin says:
and so u din do it..im suppose to do it..they will say such nonsense tomorrow..
Navin says:
then i'll say..fuck off..
Thipan says:
Tomorrow's gonna be a fking shit ass day
Thipan says:
skip la
Navin says:
half day da
Navin says:
im not goin to skip a half day
Thipan says:
DA DA DA CHECK MY EMAIL











Here comes the best part...












Navin says:
what email?
Thipan says:
beside my pm
Navin says:
i din notice
Navin says:
fuck
Thipan says:
ROFLLLLLLLLLL
Thipan says:
Hi navin
Navin says:
and I was having the longest convo with u
Navin says:
damn
Navin says:
nick
Thipan says:
LOLLL
Thipan says:
yes yes
Navin says:
thats fucked up..
Navin says:
hahahahaha
Thipan says:
LOL. are you laughing to yourself now


*Names have been altered to protect the identity of the innocent.

Our Phone Lines are Closed.

Dear readers,

The Oh Family Estate phone lines are closed from 0000 onwards. This is due to the new regulations that has been imposed in the family. It is because of the installation of the new Mio TV that our phone lines are now connected to our wireless network, thus, if the router is to be turned off, our phone lines will be disengaged. In addition, with the WOTH (woman of the house) paranoia kicking in, she will remove the power cord of the router every night at midnight.

Thus, our phone lines will be closed at 0000.

For emergency, please dial: 999.
For any other matters, please dial: 1800-YOUTHINK-I-GIVEASHIT

Filing Update

Oh yea, just to continue on from the last post, I actually had my nails cut short before I filed it.

So, after I filed it, I realised that I should've not cut my nails so short cause after filing it, the tips of my fingers were hurting.

Bad.

Lol, and the edges of my fingernails were actually sore and red. Darn! Guess I was too happy filling my nails. It hurts. So yea.

DON'T CUT YOUR NAILS IF YOU'RE GONNA FILE IT.

Best Damn Thing Ever Created.

What’s the best invention of all time in my opinion?

The nail filer!

Gosh I don’t understand why it’s only for girls. They should have a nail filer for guys as well. I know there are guys out there who uses it as well. And they might be labeled as “sissy” or a “wuss” but what’s wrong with wanting to look good? Is it only permissible for the female to do it? So it’s a crime if guys do it? What, the fashion police will halt guys who file their nails and aggressively start whacking them with their riot stick?

Ha! Well whatever, I don’t really care. I use the nail filer (or whatever you call it) for a different purpose! Gosh. I’m sure most of you know that I have a skin condition, and it annoys me as HELL that I keep scratching my body whenever it itches and then I have ugly scratch marks on my body. But hey hey hey, all hail the inventor of the nail filer!

Not only does it make my nails look better, BUT it allows me to scratch away the itch AND still keep away the ugly scratch marks and scars! (Hurray for the nail filer!) Muahaha. I borrowed my sister’s nail filer just last night and couldn’t help but be amazed at it’s… It’s… AWESOMENESS and … It’s just…

Woah.

I couldn’t stop grinning as I file my nails and then purposely scratching myself in front of my sister while at the same time telling her, “Look Joy! No scratch marks!”

The nail filer = best thing on earth.

Trust me. I know now.

To France!

So finally it has been confirmed! Dad passed the interview and the whole family's going to Paris, France for 2 years. Without me of course. (Curse you NS!)

I was uninformed for most of the time until only this morning. (Joy claimed that my Dad didn't want me to know about it. HUH. What sort of Dad does that. So it was only this morning that mum told me.

SO....

They're ditching me in Singapore! They're leaving me to rot out in army while they're enjoying the food, the atmosphere the whole country. PARIS! Tsk tsk. LOL. Ok ok I'm not trying to paint a bad picture of my family or whatever but...

I'll be like a nomad. Taking turns staying at different homes. AMK grandma, YISHUN grandma, aunts and other aunts' house. Holy doly. Traversing through different family lifestyles. No more home cooked food! No more homecooked food (mum's rather.) No more playing ball with my sister! No more... All no more!

Awww so sad. SO SAD!




NOT.


Wohoo!! I can do whatever I want! No more restrictions. No more "only 4 hours a day ah!" No more "do this do that!" No more!

-Gives a contented sigh-

I think I'll go down a bottle of cough syrup and knock myself out dreaming about this... Woots!





But... But I'll miss them! S0bx. Criesxsxsxs. -Spams Emoticons-

T.T
:[
:(
=[
=(

Lim has the Charms.

Went out with Lim today to apply as relief teachers at various schools around the area.

Went to apply at Fuchun Sec, Fuchun Primary then we decided we were hungry and went over to the CC to have our lunch. (At KFC if you must know.) Oh and the only thing I ever have at KFC are Cheese Fries (oh yes oh yes!) and fries.

Oh and that KFC is manned by the deaf. So the only way to order things was to point at the menu which was modified. Had everything in there.

When it was my turn to order, I looked at her, looked at the menu, stabbed my fingers vigorously at the cheese fries picture, looked at her again and showed her that I wanted 2 like this:




We had to wait for our cheese fries cause they ran short of it, but when it did come...

-mutterseveryswearwordinthespanof5seconds-

Mr Yeo Heelim had double the amount of cheese on HIS bloody plate of fries than I did! AND I THINK I CAN COOK UP A HYPOTHESIS ON WHY HE GOT MORE.

Hypothesis:

Apparently, according to my superior brain, I believe that Lim had turned on the charms on the young deaf lady at the counter. He treated her with much more respect. He saw through like an X-ray and what other people saw on the outside, he saw nothing. He looked past all her imperfections and treated her as a HUMAN. Not a oh-so-you're-blind-thus-I-must-emphasise-on-hand-signals young, deaf person. Yes that is it. He still talked to her as if she wasn't deaf at all when ordering his food. And therefore, because of that, she must've felt so good about it that she awarded him with more cheese.

That's... DUMB SHIT. I was just using the universal way of speaking with each other! What's wrong with that? I don't deserve more cheese? I don't?! Asses! Call your manager out. I want to have a word with her.

But wow, lim HAS THE CHARMS. Didn't know he could turn it ON babeh!

Goodbye.

Good bye memories.

Delirious

Reminiscing the history of my life.

Just that day, that period.

How to judge if what I did was right? Or wrong? How does one know if one did the correct thing? Is that few hours enough to come to a conclusion?

Maybe I was wrong? Maybe I was right?

Gosh so many questions, so many thoughts.

And no answer.




I'm confused and lost.

Boredom Kills.

"Blue da ba" dee plays in the background.

Dances to the beat with freaky movements.

"I'm blue da ba dee da ba die"

Fridays are supposed to be fun days. And should be especially so since my parents and sister are out. But it's NOT. I'm so bored so bored that I... I... Maybe I SHOULD WATCH PORN or something.

.
.
.

OMG lar! How'd that grow so MASSIVE. Eee it has a tiny shade of green. Seriously, never thought it could grow so large! How do they get it to be that size!? Gosh wonder what's the secret. I could use it. (Err, really?)

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It's a... BANANA LA LA LA!

OK. I am just bored.

Like HUH

I cease to exist.

Hate me, hate you.
So stuff you.

Keeping Fit.

Been keeping fit peoples.

Fitness is vital. Fitness will keep you fit. Fitness is necessary.

Fitness improves your libido. Uh. Really?

Fit adults have more electrifying sex lives than individuals who lead sedentary lives. Exercise done properly enhances sexual functioning because it can naturally increase testosterone levels in both males and females.

Like wow.

So I've been running, scaling mountains in Woodlands, walked 20KM around Yishun to Khatib and finally to Chong Pang with exercise partner that Cat! And we're doing pretty insane stretches too, like where we squat down with arms outstretched, and palms facing forwards, holding that for like 30 seconds. (Eh you think 30sec is very short huh. You try lah. If you can hold it for more than a min, I'll... Whip out my didi to let you hammer.)

So I've conditioned my endurance! I probably could hold certain positions longer now.

My motion functions with no dysfuntions!



Yes yes! I feel it coursing through me.
It surges through every part of me and especially in some places...
OMG. What a rush!













Loooooooooooool.

My Heart Just Broke

A piece of me has broken away.

I don't understand but it feels as if someone I love has just disappeared from my life.

Just like that.

Ouch.

It's gonna leave a scar for a long time. A very long time.

I'll never forget her. My laptop...







My wonderful laptop...
You'll be missed.
Truly.
Dearly.

My Idol.

Meet my idol.

The number 8, then the number 24.




Kobe Bryant by the numbers:

81pts in a game
62pts in three quarters
42pts in 1st half
55pts in 2nd half
30pts in one quarter
12 threes in one game
9 threes without a miss in a game
8 threes in one half
9 straight games with 40pts+
4 straight games with 50pts+
27 games with 40pts+ in a season
10 games with 50pts+ in a season
4th player ever with a 35pt+ season average
5th player ever with a 2800pt+ season
1st player ever to outscore a team through 3 quarters
1st player ever with a 2800pt 180 three season

OH MY LORD. Slaps face

Oh and here's him selling ankle insurance.



He's the man.

Chinese New Year '09!

So tomorrow is the eve of Chinese New Year!

Woots, and I'm pretty sure I'm gonna rake in more $ than last year that's for sure.

WHY?!

Because since the last new year, there has been 2 marriages within the family already. SO YEA. HAHA.

The more marriages happening = the more money that'll be appearing in my pocket.

Y(^-^)Y It's a smilie with the TWIST, if you don't get it.

True true.

It's been like almost a month and a half since I was done with my previous job and since then, I've been wasting a lot of time at home. Been job-hunting of course, but that's an expensive HOBBY man. I had to top up my ez card with 20 bucks in just 2 weeks. That's insane and I can't even get a concession. BLARDDYYYY HELLL BOY.

Oh yea, I realised how much I've NOT grown since secondary school. Not even half a centimetre!

165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm 165cm

That's not really flattering for a guy. (Right ladies?! You dream boy would be at 180+ HUH.) Well GALS, listen up, I don't care and I don't give a F__K to your dreams. If your dreams were of a tangible matter, I would crunch it up, stab it a million times with a fork, put it between my ass and fart on it, then torch it, and finally stuff it down your chest and give it a good pat.

YEA that's what I'll do. 165 cm FTW!!!

But hey... IF, I said IF, I WAS taller... Gosh that'd be so fun.

I would be able to tap my card on the bus just by facing my butt to the machine! Maybe with a tiny hop. YEA!! How cool would that look!

Gets onto bus.
Turns around and butt-taps the machine.
BEEP!
Smirks at the height disadvantaged people around.
"Bet you couldn't do that!"
Stands next to a little dude.
Leans down and whispers, "How's the air down there?"

HAHAHAAAaaa. Haha. Ha... Sighs... 165...

Doesn't matter! Oh one last thing! My wonderful wardrobe has grown to include an extra pair of jeans! Here's what's in it:

Shirts: 8 T-shirts.
Long pants: 2 pairs of jeans + 1 regular long pants.
Short pants: 2 pairs.



1 0WN ¥0µ 4££ N00B$.

Working Out.

Woots.

Finally stopped procrastinating and took action. Went over to Yishun stadium with classmate Cat to do some ruuunnnniiiiinnngggg!

Let me tell you! Ever since I graduated from school, I have not exercise since 2008. (Besides the basketball games.) And running about 6 rounds around the track actually hurts. My joints felt stiff, muscles were aching. The usual 4 rounds which was quite simple to get through got me panting like nuts.

Then Cat, (what Cat? Which Cat? That Cat! -- Haha sounds fun to say it like that.) had to be an Auntie and walked around the track. LOL. Ok ok you ran a few... 1 is it?JK!

Heard about Drama Stretches from her afterward when we cooled down. (HUH. You have to stretch for drama?! DRAMA LAMAA) Sounds pretty tough. Maybe I'll list down instructions on how to do it and you can try it for yourself when I ask her again.

So yea, I WANT TO GET INTO SHAPE MAN. I wanna flex those PECS in the mirror! And see the warm sunlight wash upon my manly chest and abdomen. And I shall soak in the MAJESTIC sight of my mascular BODEYYYYY.

Soon soon! I do secret exercises when my parents are away and sneak in a couple more when they're not near me... Shhh...

Great Grandma

Went over to a caring home for the elderly yesterday night to visit my great grandma.

What can I say, the whole place looks pretty desolate. I don't see too much happy faces. Then again, these old people probably aren't too happy being there. I mean, if you have family to take care of you, why do you need to be at a caring home right?

Heard from my mum that when GG was first brought over to the home, she didn't fare too well and was seemed really reluctant to be brought to a home. After that, her condition worsened and had to be brought back to the hospital again to stabilise her condition.

I'm pretty sure she can hear what is being said around her. I don't get it. When we go see her. Everyone acts as if she is unable to hear her. Uncles and Aunts all speak in soft voices when they discuss about what to do with her. Actually, right now, she's fine enough to be brought back home, except that she probably needs more attention and care. BUT, despite the numerous children and grandchildren and nephews and nieces that she has, there doesn't seem to be ANYONE who wants to take the initiative to take up that responsibility. And it's not as if they CANNOT. I've been to their place before! Every year! They're all more than financially capable of taking care of her. Maybe they don't have the time? Perhaps, but with THAT many (I count at least 50?) children/grandchildren/nieces/nephews not even ONE can look after her?

Tsk tsk.

OK, you might say that I might be talking too much and why doesn't MY family take care of her. We will! When we move to Yishun in March, I'm sure if the circumstances are right, and Dad has earns some expenses from renting out rooms, we will definitely look after her. Yea we will.

It's just pretty sad to see an old lady of 102 years old, (Yes! ONE-HUNDRED-TWO!) lying in a bed the whole time in a caring home and not a home of her own, surrounded by loved ones. And this lady has left a family that spans FIVE generations. That's ONE BIG FAMILY I assure you. I bet YOUR family tree isn't as long as mine! Show it to me if you do. And I'll... I'll pierce a ring in my ding-a-ling-ling!

So yea, I really really hope that Great Grandma gets well soon! It'll be great just to see her up and walking again with that wrinkly smile on her face!



Force be with you Great Grandma.