Best Damn Thing Ever Created.

What’s the best invention of all time in my opinion?

The nail filer!

Gosh I don’t understand why it’s only for girls. They should have a nail filer for guys as well. I know there are guys out there who uses it as well. And they might be labeled as “sissy” or a “wuss” but what’s wrong with wanting to look good? Is it only permissible for the female to do it? So it’s a crime if guys do it? What, the fashion police will halt guys who file their nails and aggressively start whacking them with their riot stick?

Ha! Well whatever, I don’t really care. I use the nail filer (or whatever you call it) for a different purpose! Gosh. I’m sure most of you know that I have a skin condition, and it annoys me as HELL that I keep scratching my body whenever it itches and then I have ugly scratch marks on my body. But hey hey hey, all hail the inventor of the nail filer!

Not only does it make my nails look better, BUT it allows me to scratch away the itch AND still keep away the ugly scratch marks and scars! (Hurray for the nail filer!) Muahaha. I borrowed my sister’s nail filer just last night and couldn’t help but be amazed at it’s… It’s… AWESOMENESS and … It’s just…

Woah.

I couldn’t stop grinning as I file my nails and then purposely scratching myself in front of my sister while at the same time telling her, “Look Joy! No scratch marks!”

The nail filer = best thing on earth.

Trust me. I know now.