Ouch

Why does it hurt so bad?

I'm baaaack

Hello people! I am back. Currently I'm enjoying my life after being enslaved by you-should-know-who-they-are for two whole years, thus here I am in Europe, trying to enjoy myself.

Note I said "trying". In my honest opinion, to have fun while touring is subjective I think. Most mainstream tourists like sightseeing and visiting famous places. I wouldn't say I'm not, but I wouldn't say I am either. Visiting museums after museums and famous places after places just isn't my "thang" you see. I only like going places if there is something to DO there. Or if something really interests me. Like going to a famous beach, I wouldn't mind that! There's the beach, surf and sun to enjoy so yeah, who wouldn't have fun there? But museums are a no-no. I don't understand art and try as I might, reading all those information panels then taking a step back from the art piece, I still wouldn't understand it.

One person I know who is your typical tourist and whom I am travelling with is my cousin. 24 years of age (not too far away from me but at that age, you're officially an independent working adult already), 155cm+ height, likes wearing floral dresses, who I think has the gait of pregnant mother and finally the epitome of cute (note: in a derogatory manner), I present to you, Algin Oh. I shall make no attempt at obscuring her name since I'm sure everyone knows who I am travelling with.

"Neeek! Helwp mee take peekture!"

"HOO HAHA HOO HOO HAHAHAHHAA-" (dash meaning she stops her laughter suddenly. As if someone covered her mouth, which sometimes I wished happened)

V(^^) [the pose she always does when taking pictures]

BOOM BOOM BANG BANG (Her elephant like footsteps)

"So magnifficient!"

You see what I've to deal with?

I feel like I'm back enslaved by the army when she goes on her shopping rampage and unfortunately I've to take the brunt of it. She takes countless "peektures" and I'm the one taking it.

And now let me recount to you an episode where I experienced first hand, her cunningness in getting me take another one of her photos.

Today in Barcelona, we went to a Temple designed by Gaudi (aka a Church. was quite pretty actually pretty) and I was following her towards the patio when I realized that she wanted to go there to take pictures. Knowing full well that I'll have to be the one taking it, I started to slow my paces down and tried to blend in with the crowd. I caught her looking over her shoulder to see if I was following on the pretext of brushing dust away from her jacket. Quickly I hid behind a pillar and did my own things. I waited for a few minutes to pass before I peeked out.

She's a monster!

There she was, camera still in hand, and behind those auntie glasses of hers (maybe it's not the glasses, maybe it's cause she's wearing them that's why it looks aunti-ish) her eyes (strengthened by LASIK) were s searching for me. I wanted to continue hiding and see how long she could wait for me, but I knew I had to come out sooner or later. So I stepped out into her radar and immediately she called out to me. And cunningly, I knew she had a plan in place to get me to take that damn shot of her.

"Neeek!" she called out with that cutesy (again, in a derogatory manner) voice and gestured for me to come towards her.

Lowering my head in despair I begin walking to her.

"Come see come see! The description of this building very interesting! Go read!!"

Aha! I knew something was ip and this was evidently the ruse she was planning for me all along. How shrewd of her. I bet once I finish reading and start showing any sign of going back inside the church, she'll try to stop me. To test whether my theory was true, I took a few minutes to digest the description I was told to read (which I expected to be boring and it was so) and made my move.

In a blink of an eye, she appeared in front of me in all her cuteness (again, you know what I'm going to say. Remember, it's never a praise, never a praise in this context.), held the camera up to my face and said, "Tank eu!" and proceeded to take up her standard pose.

WHAT DID I TELL YOU!! I knew I was right all along. That was indeed a very cunning plan.

I have developed a few cunning counter measures of my own to combat this.

Firstly, to prevent her from sapping up all my energy from walking around and following her on her rampage of clothes shops, and to minimize the extent of the damage, I've purposely missed out places on the maps that she initially planned to go. Or sometimes, if those places seemed closed and I realized before she does that it's actually still open, I'll steer her away from it and onwards to the next destination before she finds out.

Secondly, in my futile hope that I'll never have to take another shot of her and her cute poses (ahem ahem) again, I've been praying for the destruction of the dam digital camera. At every demise of the camera, whether she dropped it or whether it's running out of battery, I would secretly rejoice on the inside while playing along with her dejection on the outside. ("Aww man, should be more careful with it next time!" Or, "Aiyo, why didn't you charge it last night, gosh now we can't take any pictures. Too bad I guess"

TOO BAD INDEED! MUAHHAHAA.

For now, just today, I've managed to escape her clutches for she's on her conquests of museums and I've made it clear that I'm sitting those out. So please, sisters, brothers from another mother, join me in prayers of hopeful failure of any photographic device she's carrying an the eradication of old-yet-wanna-act-cute beings.

Amen.